Sunday, May 14, 2006

Had a very sane finals week—only music finals, so I spent a good chunk of the last 7 days with Amaretto sours from Trops. Think I did well in all my classes, my jury went pretty well. I am so excited for summer!

I am going to be working on several things this summer:
1) My project…yeah, I have my own corn…it’s pretty amazing.
2) Taking lessons from Dan to get ready for my recital in October.
3)Singing in a concert version of Carmen in July here in Columbia. Even if it is a small part, I am totally psyched.
4) Catching lots of bugs.
5)Spending more time with my friends.
6)Working out more.
7)Doing the Show-Me games, maybe the 800, probably not the 5K.
8) Turning 21 and drinking like Frank Sinatra! (That’s why the lady is a tramp…)

Usually the prospect of large amounts of time with nothing to do scares me. Creation (singing, thought, originality) takes a back seat to production (school work). I guess in my twisted mind, I equate my need for a sense of purpose with fighting against something. Real or unreal, I often perceive my self-worth as a measure of how much I have struggled—thus my habit of inventing new hurdles to jump through (ie, taking 20 hours a semester, double majoring, working a part-time job, maintaining a relationship, etc). Being a slave to the meritocracy is my way of life. If I'm not fighting, then I feel no impetus to exist.

Such is mango.

So I’m going to make a conscious effort to chill out.
[Jules: Bitch, be cool!]

3 comments:

"the" Mrs. Astor said...

Frank once said, "I feel bad for people who don't drink. They wake up in the morning and that's the best they're gonna feel all day."

Poetry.

Ms Bees Knees said...

a real man grows his own corn.

add to your list: Work towards being Ms Bees pet candyass. again, i am drunk. don't listen to a word i write.

Ed Grow said...

Alexis-

Alcoholism has never been so glamourous. Love.

Bees-

I know! What does being your "pet candyass" entail? My interest is terminally piqued--Love.