Thursday, March 23, 2006

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Last semester I took an entomology class that was the culmination of 13+ years of bug-geekiness.

Yes, I was the kid who ran around with butterfly nets, caught moths at baseball games instead of paying attention, and drove my parents absolutely crazy with my insect fanaticism. After junior high my obsession waned…maybe it was that I was scared of becoming an entomologist in the fashion of Silence of the Lambs?

Anyway, this past fall, I got back in the swing of things, and this is a picture of approximately 1/3 of my collection (which I got a 110% on).

I would like to thank the academy and my saint of a roommate, who put up with the ziplock bags full of vegetable matter and bugs in our freezer.

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Had a fun weekend, never expected to:

1) Watch Patrick Dell vomit into the sink repeatedly.
2) See Craig kissed by 3—yes count them, 3 straight guys (on second thought why does that surprise me?)
3) Dance to criss-cross in brown town with my pants on backwards? (PS-I love you Jaime/Scott).
4) Actually hear the words from Mike’s mouth, “She hit me with a spoon in the ear, and now I’m bleeding.”

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Stickin' it to the man (Darwin)

Nothing like not being able to breath to remind yourself that you are a peanut allergic, severely nearsighted, asthmatic, genetic aberration that has slipped through the cracks of natural selection. Yay for me.

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Craig and me after the opera a few weeks ago.

Saturday, March 11, 2006

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Manda and I went to see the Eagles of Death Metal last night in KC. They were fucking fabulous! The Strokes were also pretty good—although I have never seen that many teenage Caucasian boys with wafros in my life.

I haven’t been so excited about a current band since I discovered the Scissor Sisters in fall of ’04.

The lead singer of EODM, J-Devil, was amazing…anyone who describes their mustache as a “soft-boomerang-of-love” is boss in my book.

Several inconsequential observations made over the past week:

1)I saw a guy throwing away pill-boxes of soil samples into the dumpster outside the geology building. Ok, ok, I know they are “soil samples”, but the ridiculousness of throwing dirt in the trash can struck me as subtly metaphoric.

2) While going through the Hardee’s drive-thru I saw a man (dressed semi-nicely) open his door and bark into the speaker. When I write “bark”, I mean *bark*, he sounded like a smoker with an angry bull seal voice (later Manda and I referred to him as “seal man”). More remarkable was the 18-inch long string of drool hanging from his chin. He made no attempt to wipe it off, and as far as I know, he didn’t even know it was there. It wasn’t runny drool, it was really goopy, and eventually, when he stumbled back to his Kia, the drool strand got caught on his car door. He then drove off.

This left me wondering. What is the explanation for this seal barking/drool episode? Did other cars see this behind me? Was he drunk at 1:30 PM on a Sunday? Was he having a heart-attack? Why am I so fascinated by the grotesque, that I would replay this situation over and over in my head for the past week trying to discover what was going on?

PS-Don’t think I am an obese American who eats at Hardee’s all the goddamn time (I read Fast Food Nation, thank you very much)—but my skinny emo-hipster diet of canned fruit and ramen noodles causes me to have severe, but occasional fat cravings to prevent my brain from metabolizing my other weaker, more passive internal organs.

3)I saw two (presumably) city-girls transfixed by a possum in a tree on my way to class on Wednesday. They were standing in front of the tree, dressed in their Northface fleece, cuffed jeans and ugg-boot best, while holding up their camera phones and saying things like:

Girl 1: Is that a possum?
Girl 2: I think so. Is it sleeping?
Girl 1: Yeah. This is so crazy.

People from the city have such an over-reverence for nature. It’s really just funny. I suppose when you grow up in the middle of buttfuck-nowhere Missouri (which sounds like more fun than it is), and cows routinely get out of their fences and amble their clumsy bovine selves up your driveway…you just get used to being surrounded by dumb wildlife.

4)After the Eagles of Death Metal concert, Manda and I got back to Columbia after last call tonight, and witnessed what could only be described as a mass-migration of light jeans/striped oxford shirt-wearing, stumbling frat boys making their way back to wherever they came from.

We saw at least 15-20 in the span of a block. They looked exactly the same. It’s like a uniform. An army uniform for cookie-cutters.

Sunday, March 05, 2006

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In honor of BBM appearance at the Academy Awards, last night Craig and I watched what could possibly be the gayest best picture winner ever: An American in Paris. It has extended dance sequences, lots of Gershwin undertones, and gayest of all, Gene Kelly in tight yellow spandex.

[Cue Lighted fountain and brass sequence, “And then I realized, I love Josh.”]

Alright, he’s kind of a Baldwin. Sigh.